hiya hun,
 
I posted a similar topic earlier- just to let you know, your not on your own I have a similar dillema. I think they only way round is to keep backing your corner hun!
 
I've copied and pasted mine below xx
 
  I have a dillema. Basically I am getting married next year and me and my partner had drawn up a guest list.
I'm very happy with an 'intimate' wedding, 80 is just enough to make it personal but for there to be a great atmosphere. Anyway, to the point, my fiance wants to invite his best friends girlfriend. Now we dont get on (not because I pre judge anyone!!) but because she is very immature and childish...let me explain.
 We got along at first, despite getting pregnant on purpose the first night she slept with my fiance's best mate (I have this info on good authority). She also drank heavily throughout her pregnancy and went clubbing 9 months pregnant drinking (don't even get me started!!!). Anyway, now she is 19, shacked up with my fiance's best mate, a 11 month old baby and living on the doll in a council flat. I started to dislike her when she refused to let my fiance's best mate see his mates or have any time away. I can remember vividly her excuse was "...well he's more mine than yours!" ...yes I know what your thinking!
My fiance's best mate has told us time to time he dislikes her and is only with her because of the baby.
We have 80 places for the wedding, including the bride & groom and have split this into equal parts so both of us can invite 40 people inc ourselves and considering my own close family takes up 35 people, its not alot to toy around with. Basically, the guests list has turned into a nightmare trying to find the 'right' people (I really hate that term) to invite. Its hard to choose who is most important and I really dont want to offend anyone. I really don't agree with inviting this girl, and most importantly this reason is because we can't invite some of our closest friends and relatives because there is no room so why should I let him invite her? He say's he has too- because she is a part of his mate's life, now although I agree with this (despite his mate constantly trying to find excuses to leave her, and the fact that he is banned from seeing his best mates) I just can't justify giving her an invite when my Aunty & Uncle can't have an invite.
I've asked this guy would he be offended if I sent him an invite requesting his attendance only and he said "no, its fine, its your day" however, she has found out and threatened not to let him go if she can't go. Now this is nothing personal, despite the fact that i dispise this girl non of our guests are permitted to bring partners or children- its an intimate affair- Please help!
 

Thanks for your help and understanding - I am really struggling with the idea of inviting him and Im dreading having the same conversation with my H2B again about whether or not to invite him. But thanks so much for the advice!
xx

Hi there.
Me and my husband had sort of the same maby problem at our wedding in september. We had invited the freinds who interduced us, we bouth know and love this coupel, but we also know that they dont always hold ther drinks to well and he can get quit rude when drunk. Our way around this was to give each of our gust a amaunt of drink vouchers and then let them pay for the rest of there drinks after that. This, we hoped, meant that they would not be able to afford to get to drunk.
I will also say that you are well with in your rights to let your partners friends know some "game rools". Tell them that giving you partner drugs is not okay and figer out a way to make it understod. I have knowen brides who have had a few rools and told the gust that if theise rools was broken she would not be speeking to them.
My husband and I let it be unterstood that some topickes was not welcome at oure wedding. We also before hand had agreed on if push came to show we might have to throw out some of our gust. This did not happen, but we knew it was a possibility.
Hope it was some sort of help..
~Froeken84~